In an earlier article, I told you how I interned in New York City for a summer. I got to experience the island of Manhattan like a real New Yorker – reading in Washington Park, getting the regular from my favorite cafe, trying the new “it-spots” before they exploded into tourist traps. I gained invaluable work experience through opportunities that I never could have had in my hometown. I had the time of my life during my summer in New York, but how I got there is sort of a funny story. Would you be surprised to find out that my motivation for heading to New York for a summer was a breakup?
To Get Over A Four Year Relationship, I Hid In New York City
I was with Mr. Hollywood for about four years, on and off. We had been high school sweethearts that lasted into college – at furthest we lived about an hour apart when we were in different colleges. But in the last eight months of our relationship, he had been living in Los Angeles while I was still at school in Pennsylvania. After visiting twice and totally falling in love with SoCal, I had made the plan to intern in LA the summer before my senior year, in hopes of securing a full-time job and moving there permanently after graduation. And then Mr. Hollywood and I would move in together and live in La La Land, happily ever after.
Except, things didn’t turn out that way. Distance was hard – he was experiencing this whole new world on the west coast, and I was hustling back east trying to figure out what the heck I wanted to do with my life (spoiler alert: it’s still a work in progress). So come January, I was left with a blank slate for summer plans. Sure, I could have interned in Pittsburgh – there are plenty of opportunities in our city of steel. But how could I sit at home while my ex was living it up as an Angeleno? I knew I had to challenge myself, take myself out of my comfort zone. So I dedicated my spring semester of junior year to securing an internship and housing in New York City.
And like you read in my previous article – I got career and personal experiences in my summer in the city that I wouldn’t trade for the world. All when I could have been moping around my parents’ house. Maybe a breakup isn’t the best reasoning for interning in a different city, but I’m grateful as hell that everything worked out the way that it did.
A Guy Dumped Me On Monday, And I Left The Country On Friday
Mr. Finance was a guy that I knew from high school, but never really got to know. Thanks to technology, we reconnected on Facebook over a shared favorite TV show (I swear to god, 70% of my romances have started from a mutual interest in TV. So anyone who thinks that binging is a waste of time can suck on that.). We had been seeing each other for about a month. Then he ended things with me over the phone on a Monday. I had had plans that weekend to go to a college football game with him; Instead, I hopped in my car, drove six hours, crossed the U.S. border, and spent the weekend in Toronto with three of my friends. They had the trip planned already, and I was able to hop in since I was driving-distance.
That weekend I ate good food, laughed with my friends, took awful pictures of myself, and got to see the shooting locations for some of my favorite Toronto-filmed shows. I got my passport stamped, I talked to locals, and I got to take in how beautiful the turquoise Lake Ontario is in the fall when the leaves change color. Again – instead of holing up in my apartment and feeling sorry for myself, I got out and saw things I never had before with people that I love being around.
Spontaneity Is The Key
Sometimes in relationships, I get so fixated on planning the future out. “We’re” doing this next weekend, “we’re” going to this next month, and so on. But if you’re still at the point in my life where you’re not in any sort of committed relationship, you can’t know where you will be, or with whom, throughout this 2018. And sure, you could stew over it and worry about it. Or you could say “fuck it all” and create your own plans to go on your own adventures this year. I’m going to go with the latter – will you?
I’m not trying to tell you to blow your money or make any sort of unwise financial decisions trying to run away from your problems – that’s never a good thing. Running away doesn’t have to mean literally going on a trip – it can be reconnecting with an old friend, trying an event by yourself, or picking up a new hobby that took the backseat during your relationship. What I am saying is, when life takes you on an unexpected turn – lean into it. Go with it. Run with it. Don’t sit down and curl up in a ball in misery. Seize the opportunity that the universe has given you to take a path unforeseen. The distraction will help your healing, and you’ll thank yourself for the gift of amazing memories gained from a time that could have been so melancholy.